Who was the last person to get on your nerves, upset you in some way, or do you a wrong? When you think of them, or the event, how does it make you feel?
Often when you recall past hurts we relive the emotions of that time. It is as though they are happening again in your present. When you do this it can become a habit and you then find that you are living in the past, this is often the seed of unhappiness and depression.
Negative ties to the past keep you anchored in negative emotions that stop you moving on in life. To feel blame or fault in others, to hold grudges and vendettas, or to wish ill on others actually damages you. When you focus on negative feelings your endocrine system releases hormones and chemicals that will eventually damage the very cells of your body. Symptoms such as high blood pressure, hardened arteries, strokes and heart attacks, ulcers and irritable bowel syndrome can be not exacerbated, if not actually caused by the stressful emotions of anger and hurt. When you live in the past, by definition you do not live in the present.
In our book “Live in The Present” the first step to creating your happiness is letting go of you past negative attachments. The process of letting go involves acknowledging the people and events that have hurt you. Next you need to engage in the process of forgiveness.
Forgiveness does not mean that you are in anyway accepting that the other person’s behaviour was acceptable. To forgive means to ‘forgo’ you emotional attachment. You are consciously deciding to stop allowing their negative behaviours to affect your present life.
To live in the present means to let go of the past.